There are those mornings when I wake up in a funk. There's no particular rhyme or reason to it, it just happens. Perhaps something is subtlety eating at me, or it's just a general feeling of ennui. Whatever it is, whatever its cause, on these days of funk I find myself out-of-sorts in some strange can't-quite-put-my-finger-on-it sort of way. On those mornings I sometimes, sometimes, don't even feel like going out for a run. I'm feeling 'blah' and running is not a 'blah' thing."Not life, but good life, is to be chiefly valued." - Socrates
But then habit kicks in, and I do what I always do in the morning -> coffee, cookie, run, shower (the kiddo fits in there somewhere depending on the day), work...
Today I woke up with that vague 'blah' feeling, even though the sun shined bright and the air was springtime warm on a mid-January day. I put on my shorts, shirt, shoes and headed off for the trails sans watch. I didn't think about it, I just did it, and I didn't expect much other than an easy recovery 5 miles that I would just get through and get done and then move on through my ho-hum day. Blah.
The first few steps felt labored, forced, heavy, reluctant. But little by little I felt the 'blah" begin to lift from my shoulders, then my arms...my legs, my feet. My head and my vision began to clear. My feet moved in short, light, quick steps. At mile 2 I stopped at the top of a hill that allows me to see beyond Longs Peak to the north, the Indian Peaks to the West, and clear down to Pikes Peak to the south. To the east, for as far as you can see, is big sky and golden plains rolling all the way to Kansas. I stood there looking, seeing, feeling the world on this day.
By the time I returned home I did not not want to go inside so I fetched my somewhat uninterested 15 year-old Aussie mix, switched my sneaks for my Five Fingers, and went for another mile or so, this was as much a walk as jog. I didn't want to stop...
And this hour of my day made all the difference on this day, for this person, for this life - This run was such a gift because it was so unexpected - and I went off to class and spoke about Socrates and principles and things that matter and things that do not matter. And what I spoke, I felt.
"It is not living that matters, but living rightly." - Socrates
And I am so very thankful for the ability, freedom and will to run...To have found this thing that puts the world right for me...
"The true runner is a very fortunate person. He has found something in him that is just perfect."- George Sheehan
I've started a lot of runs reluctantly, felt terrible for the first 1/2 mi.. but I've ended every one feeling energized and "right".. great post.. next time you can see Pikes Peak, that's me waving :-)ReplyDelete
Caolan, I often have the same type of experience. I KNOW that once I get moving, my body will just take over and I can just go along for the ride, but the mind has it's little commentary. I can honestly say that 99% of the time, I always feel better for going. :-)Delete
Yes, I agree with both of you, and that's the case even on good days. But on this particular day, the effect was magnified. There are still those days that I go out, get the run done, and come home feeling better, but not elated. Sometimes I even get back still feeling grumpy, just not AS grumpy ;)Delete
I *love* the days where I can see Pikes Peak to the south--it's so far away that I know it must be very clear for me to be able to spot it (I'm in Longmont). I love your blog--you're a great writer.ReplyDelete
Thankyou for your inspirational words - and for that quote by George Sheehan at the end. I can empathize with all you say.ReplyDelete